Spirituality in Medicine

(This is published in National Journal of Homoeopathy December 2010 issue)

Recently I attended two lectures by Brahma kumari Sr Shivaniben, one at annual scientific conference of Malad Medical Association and other at BK Centre, Borivali. I frequently watch many of her shows on Astha and Sanskar TV channels. She has inspired me a lot and has helped me come out of my emotional difficulties. Here, I would like to share one of my understandings and experiences with our NJH readers.

            What is spirituality? Spirituality means “To know thyself”, “Taking care of one’s own self”, “Achieving stability”.  And stability can be achieved by taking care of our thoughts. The day one learns to observe his own thought processes and controls his thoughts, he will have better control over his emotions, which automatically gives him stability.

           

            A quote of Sr Shivani which touched many doctors’ hearts and made them think :  Doctors usually say: “I heal the patients and I feel very happy. What if the doctor is happy and then he heals? That is spirituality.” In first situation, in the process of healing patients and achieving happiness, we may pass through lot many stresses. But if our heart is filled with happiness and we are doing our job, not only the process will be stress free but also the quality of work will be much better.

When we interact with people, there is an exchange of energy. We usually give whatever we have. If we are happy, we spread happiness. If I am under tension what I spread to the opposite person is tension. Thus, we in the role of physicians if spread positive energy to patients, we will be able to give them better healing, because we know patient needs both physical and emotional healing. If we receive our patients with a smiling face, they tell us, half of our pain is better just by seeing you. This is just because energy travels even without words.

We need to receive number of patients’ emotional pains, many a times we experience heaviness at the end of the day. So, we need to make our emotional immunity system very strong, which in turn we can transfer back to patients while healing them. How do we make our emotional immunity system strong? Man is continuously interacting with the environment. We do not have control over external environment. But we can have control over our own self, our own thought processes.

           

            Yes, everyone of us has right to choose our thoughts, right to choose the option of being happy or unhappy. We consciously or unconsciously choose this option. We repeatedly respond/react to situations in some way and when this reaction gives us pain and stress we start blaming situations and people associated with it. Here, if we choose not to get unhappy, not to come under stress, is it possible? How? In every situation, there are two ways to react either positively or negatively, either with stress or with stability, either with happiness or with sorrow.

            Yes, it is I, one’s self who has to decide what I want. I can get whatever I choose to. I can get whatever I desire. I have to first decide what I want. If I want happiness, I can’t allow those thoughts which will bring me sorrow to enter my mind. I need to block them. Is it possible? Is it so simple to practice? No, it is not so simple but it is not difficult also and yes it is definitely possible. I have to make efforts in that direction. I have to take charge of my own self. I have to have mercy on my own self. I have to love myself. I have to decide I am not a garbage bin that I allow anybody to put any garbage(of bad words/sorrow/pain) in me. I need to protect myself through my thoughts. How? Whenever I get disturbing reaction from circumstance, I need to stop for a while, hold on my thoughts and give positive command to myself, give positive thoughts to myself. This will come through practice. Practicing it over and over by getting conscious over our thoughts will make happiness occur to us.

Let us see this through few examples :

Eg 1) When we know we have a busy hectic day ahead and somebody from our support system say our compounder or maid or driver or office boy declares he/she cannot come or will be late, our stress level goes up. If we react to our stress, we might get angry on some other people like our family members, other people who work for us etc. and many a times we experience that lot of things get into difficulty and many other people will become victim of our anger. Thus, lot of things we had thought of going smooth, goes into avoidable mess.

How can we protect ourselves from this stress and disturbance? Is it possible? Yes, if we stop for a while and think in our mind, whatever situation has come, was not our desire but it was not even in our control. So, just accept it and now what can be done? Try to do best possible by taking someone else’s help or any other alternative or by your own self but with a relaxed mind, then we will save mess. If I am relaxed, naturally my anger/ reaction on others will be prevented and my mess at that end is also prevented.

Eg. 2) Someone gets angry at me due to some misunderstanding or because he is under some stress, I feel hurt. I either react in anger to that person or suppress that anger and brood over it again and again. Why did he do that? What was my fault? Why only to me? What had I done? etc. What happens? The person who got angry gave me pain once. But when I react in anger, I send negative energy to him again. This energy will get double and it will come back to me. What happens when I brood over it with negative sad feelings? The number of times I ask that question or remember that event, I pass through pain. The person who hurt me once but I hurt myself again and again, multiple times with those questions and feelings. Who gives more pain to me? The person who hurt me or I myself?

Do I have control over the person who hurt me? No. But don’t I have control over myself? Yes, I do have. It’s time to exercise that control with awareness and control over our thoughts.

Eg.3) A lady aged 60yrs came with the difficulty of insomnia with lot of anxious thoughts. When asked in detail, information is – she has two sons both married but not getting along well with each other, both sons’ wives are also not getting along well with each other. Thus, elder son had separated in a house on rental basis for few years. Now family has decided to go for complete separation of property for both the sons. Parents owned a four-room block, which they decided to divide into two separate units. Both sons are ok with it, but the patient feels hurt seeing this divided home. Thoughts which take away her sleep are earlier we were staying in a big house, now my sons have to stay in small houses. She says she tries to remove these thoughts from her mind and starts chanting God’s name etc. but again and again same thoughts come in mind and it can’t be prevented.

Now till she changes the thoughts, feelings associated with thoughts won’t change. She was shown to view same situation from a different angle. What was there with her and her husband when her kids were small? She said their condition was worse than what is their sons’. Husband also earned good over a period of time. She has to change her thoughts in a positive manner that they as a parent have done and given their best possible. She should keep faith and trust on sons’ abilities. They will also prosper in the years to come and will buy bigger houses for themselves. Patient found sense in this. She was convinced and changing direction of thoughts relieved her anxiety and gave her peaceful sleep.

So, let’s decide today to take charge of our own self. Take charge of our thoughts. Let us decide what we want to feel and let us direct our thoughts in the direction of what is our goal. Not to pain our own self. Not to pain others. Spread positive energy to others and heal others with love.

Individualization to Happiness

National Journal of Homoeopathy (NJH) had published my article “Individualization to Happiness” in their July 2010 issue. And I had received lots of words of appreciation from lots of Doctors and my teachers.

Dr Vishpala Parthsarathy, the editor of NJH loved the thoughts and said “If we can imbibe these thoughts, which we most likely have never thought about, then it can save many marriages and many conflicts.”

Individualization is a very important law of Homoeopathy. NJH had announced an issue to be published on Individualization. And I decided to write something for the issue. I did not want to share cases from my practice this time but, instead wanted to write something different. That was the time I was listening to some of spiritual lectures by Osho. When I was repeating this word again and again in my mind, I found its very deep meaning rooted in our Way of living and in the Inter-personal relationships.

I presented my understanding in the article for Homoeopaths. But, here I would like to present my understanding and share it with each one of you.

There is no individual who has not experienced this law of individualization in his life. Dictionary meaning of ‘Individualization’ is discrimination or perception of the individual within a group or species. Let us understand it in a little detail. We all know that no two individuals are alike. Even two identical twins have their individualistic features.

The way no two individuals share same finger prints, we all have our own unique appearances, skin colour, features, tastes, likes and dislikes, interests, our unique understanding, temperament, intellectual power, our unique thoughts and emotions. Similarly our responses to different stimuli, are also different, whether they are physical, intellectual or emotional.

Say for example, even though a group of people are exposed to same situation, their reactions will be different as per their natures. Say when a family goes to attend a wedding. They all eat ice-cream there. It may happen that next day one person of the family may get fever, other may get tonsillitis and third person may be perfectly fine.

Similarly, also at the level of mind, we find individualizing, unique experiences of every human being to different situations. One person feels anxious and other frightful, one gets angry and other can handle same situation with better mental composure, one will get confused and other will have clarity, one will suppress anger and other will express it.

We come across individualizing responses to different emotions, one will throw objects and other will be snappish in response to anger. One will get increased heart beats and the other butterfly in stomach in response to anxiety. One will get uncontrollable weeping and other will not be able to cry in response to grief...

What does all this tell us? It just tells us that all human beings are different and unique in their physical appearance, likes, dislikes, cravings, aversions, mental and physical states, temperaments, emotions, intellect and also their sufferings. And this uniqueness of the individuals is called Individualization.

Individualization does not apply only to human beings but it also applies to each and every living being... Just like no two humans are alike, no two animals and no two plants are also alike... Many of us have found this experience with their pet animals.

These individualizing unique characteristics at both mental and physical levels are so easy to understand and talk about. But a question that comes to my mind is – “Is it so easy to accept this individualization (uniqueness) in each and every aspect, in our family members, friends and fellow human beings?”

We believe in uniqueness but when our thoughts, ideas, concepts, beliefs as a child, as a parent, as a family member, as a friend do not match with other person, do we grant that individualization to the other person? Do we accept their reactions and responses so easily?

Examples:

1) If my friend likes a movie and if I do not like it, will I accept it easily? I would say what is there to like in it? I would try to highlight all those things which are bad about it, while having a conversation about it.

2) When we go to a restaurant and order Chinese food, and when you notice that somebody on the next table has ordered Continental food, how many times do we make faces and show our dislike towards others? How does it matter to me what the other person has ordered? He has ordered what he likes and I have ordered what I like. But we have the tendency to say ‘How can he like that?'

3) A couple has to go to a wedding reception and wife wants the husband to wear suit but if husband wants to wear traditional dress, how many would accept it easily? Or will question his dressing sense?

4) My son wants to become musician and I want him to become doctor. How easily will I gulp his idea of becoming musician?

5) Wife has a concept that once we wake up in the morning, everyone should finish their routines and get ready fast then do other things, even on Sundays... And if husband wants to do everything in a relaxing manner, spending more time with newspaper, does not want to shave, etc., will wife be comfortable? Accept easily or there will be disturbances on these issues?

6) When husband comes home at night and wants to watch news and his wife is watching some Hindi TV serial which he just doesn't understand what is there to like about in it... How many times will he remind wife of her sub-standard choice in TV serials?

7) Every mother feels her child should eat healthy food and study whole day. He/she should live a very disciplined life. Agreed, but how many of us will comfortably agree to their eating junk foods even at times and doing time pass in other activities other than studies? Don’t we give our judgment that the way they are spending time is not right?

How easily we accept those qualities of our spouse, parents, friends, in-laws or relatives which are different from ours? Which are different from the thoughts, concepts and value systems that we possess?

Who are we to question anyone’s likes and dislikes? Still we question their thoughts and their feelings. We opine on their reactions. We become judgemental and we give our judgment. We accept what matches our temperament and we reject what is different from our tastes and temperaments. We start proving them right or wrong on the basis of the concepts we hold, and the experiences we pass through.

If we accept that individualization (uniqueness) exists, and exists only in living beings, if we know how important it is to understand this uniqueness, it is even more important to accept this individualization, in the fellow living beings, to LIVE life happily and let others live happily. Only then we will start giving freedom and space to other persons. Freedom and space to think and to feel. We will not impose our thoughts and feelings on the other person. If we respect individualization, we will not compare one living being with another and humiliate them. We will let them BE whatever they are. We will not make efforts to change them. We will let them learn from their mistakes. We will let them learn their own lessons. We will accept them, the way they are very happily. We will not reject them if they think, feel and behave differently.

Knowingly and unknowingly, we create a lot of problems in inter-person-relationships because of our non-acceptance of the other fellow human being, whether that person is our spouse, parent, children, sibling, relative, friend, neighbour, partner, colleague, boss, or employee.

If we understand this unique law of nature, accept this uniqueness in our fellow beings, most of our problems of relationships in life will be solved. Unconditional acceptance of individualization will make our life blissful... and... We will live life happily.